The Age of the Disordered Will

“This has been called the “Age of Anxiety.” Considering the attention given the subject by psychology, theology, literature, and the pharmaceutical industry, not to mention the testimony from our own lives, we could fairly well conclude that there is more anxiety today, and, moreover, that there is definitely more anxiety about anxiety now than there has been in previous epochs of history.

Nevertheless, I would hesitate to characterize this as an “Age of Anxiety,” just as I would be loathe to call this an “Age of Affluence,” “Coronary Disease,” “Mental Health,” “Dieting,” “Conformity,” or “Sexual Freedom,” my reason being that none of these labels, whatever fact or truth they may involve, goes to the heart of the matter.

Much as I dislike this game of labels, my preference…would be to call this the “Age of the Disordered Will.” It takes only a glance to see a few of the myriad varieties of willing what cannot be willed that enslave us: we will to sleep, will to read fast, will to have simultaneous orgasm, will to be creative and spontaneous, will to enjoy our old age, and, most urgently, will to will.

If anxiety is more prominent in our time, such anxiety is the product of our particular modern disability of the will. To this disability, rather than to anxiety, I would attribute the ever-increasing dependence on drugs affecting all level of our society. While drugs do offer relief from anxiety, their more important task is to offer the illusion of healing the split between the will and its refractory object. The resulting feeling of wholeness may not be a responsible one, but at least within that wholeness-no matter how willful the drugged state may appear to an outsider-there seems to be, briefly and subjectively, a responsible and vigorous will. This is the reason, I believe, that the addictive possibilities of our age are so enormous.” (1976, p.32)

Farber, L.H. (1976), Lying, despair, jealousy, envy, sex, suicide, drugs, and the good life. New York: Harper & Row.

Trusting in the Father’s Love to Surrender

Trusting in the Father’s Love to Surrender

In my independence I ran from the Lord, I felt uncomfortable anywhere near a church; it confronted my lifestyle too directly. I was “in control” self-medicating with drugs and alcohol.

Our independence, I believe, is at the heart of our sin nature- my will, me being in control, to take care of myself and meet my own emotional needs.

At salvation I really “surrendered”, leaving all my old friends, a lifestyle of drugs and alcohol and I started attending church every time the doors were open. But, had Christianity now become my new way to get my own needs met? How many of us as Christians start out strong and zealous only to taper off into a lukewarm existence or worse completely backsliding? What happens? Is it that we realize that God is not going to be manipulated by us to meet our needs our way?

In Arthur Burk’s series on South Carolina he talks about the long dark night of the soul for him being a season of learning to surrender the ordering of his life to God, allowing God to determine what he needs and when. He came to surrender what he thinks God needs to do in his life at any given time. So often we have planned out all the ways God needs to work in our lives to heal us and mature us and raise us up. God, knowing the beginning from the end, has a much better plan for our lives than we do. At twenty one years of age I felt a call to ministry. I thought I would be pastoring before thirty.  After all, my pastor had his first church before twenty five. Instead God put me in my own business where I learned many lessons and at the same time learned many things about love as I ministered in a nursing home. Then, God sent me to pastor in the Dominican Republic and to direct a medical clinic. I had never thought about missions and certainly not a medical clinic. But here my business experience turned out to be quite helpful. The point is that God had a path for me I never dreamed of; I had to surrender over and over my plan. God was never late and knew exactly how to work in my life to bring me to the place He had for me.

How do we finally start relinquishing control? I believe it takes trust- trust that God will effectively meet our emotional and material needs. Many talk a good game here but how many really and truly surrender? Coming to know the Father’s love is the best way I know to begin developing the trust necessary to start surrendering at the deeper levels.

Arthur Burk link http://www.plumblineministries.com/south_carolina

The Value of Change

             In the beginning of every year, I (Cyndi) take the first month to seek the Lord for a word for the coming year—to prepare for what the year has in store. This January I heard the word “change”. I thought, “Okay, this is going to be an interesting, possibly challenging year ahead.”              In many ways God has challenged us personally. One of our board members recently told us to “Go for the Glory!” God is calling us to greater faith and hence effectiveness in all we are doing around the world. Am I coming up to this? As I’ve just returned from ministering in one of Shiloh Place Ministries’ Agape Reformation schools, I’m pondering all the changes that happened in me and all the students that attended and I’m thinking, “What makes us want to change and can we change ourselves?” Well, there are 3 things I believe that cause us to change: 1) We have to hurt enough that we have no choice but to change, 2) We have to learn enough that we have hope for change, and 3) We have to receive enough unconditional love that we are motivated toward change.  Pain is a great motivator for change, we’re just sick and tired of being sick and tired, and we just want the pain to go away. The Word gives us hope that we can change. There are ways of forgiveness, repentance, confession—these paths that teach us and reveal a means by which our hearts can change. Change from the inside out. What about unconditional love?  Why is this so important? Because love covers…love never fails. Love holds the net under us as we launch into new things; it holds our hand as we confront the difficult people in our lives; it causes us to be unashamed of our past and allows us to look forward to our future. Love matures.

Change is always scary but not allowing God to change us is even scarier! God’s love allows us to jump into all He has, so lets go for it and do great things for God!